"Lack of boundaries invites a lack of respect."
-Unknown
I used to be a people pleaser. I wanted everyone to like me. It was exhausting! In exchange for doing my best to please everyone around me, I lost my zest for life. I became a nervous wreck by scattering my energy around so much that I did not have much energy left to take care of myself. I did not want to let people down, but I noticed that I was letting myself down, and that wasn't helping anyone. It was not fun. It also led me to depression. This was a struggle I had to fix for my own well-being.
Through self-awareness and meditation I realized that I was doing it all wrong. I had to attend to my own needs first in order to take care of others. I had to learn to say "No" to people more and "Yes" to me without taking on any religious guilt from my past. It was one of the most freeing and life-changing realizations I ever made. I was able to start loving myself first, unconditionally. I also started stirring up more love inside of me, with plenty more to dish out! I started selfishly loving myself more so I could selflessly spread that love around to everyone!
Now I experience much more joy and happiness in my life. I am able to balance all of my commitments, especially to myself (Me time!) by setting healthy boundaries. Also, by tending to my own personal needs first I am able to more effectively tend to the needs of my loved ones, co-workers and community. And I'm still able to say "No" more often, guilt-free. It truly is a win-win! For this, I am truly grateful. 🙏
More Wellness:
Positive Psychology: How to Set Healthy Boundaries: 10 Examples + PDF Worksheets
Healthline: The No BS Guide to Protecting Your Emotional Space
PsychCentral: 10 Way to Build and Preserve Better Boundaries